“As the father loved me, I also have loved you; abide in my love. If you keep my commands, you will abide in my love, just as I kept My Fathers commandments and abide in His love. These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full.” John 15:9-11

This week has been an amazing experience in trusting God and plugging in to his source in all circumstances. Monday morning I received a phone call that after a routine mammogram an “abnormality” had been seen and I would need to come back for more images and further evaluation. The fact that I work at a cancer center only heightened the possibility that this was going to be my diagnosis. I had signed up for a class on the names of God and it was beginning on the evening after receiving that call. As I opened God’s word and begin to dig deeply into Who He really is my spirit began to find calm in the mist of the unknown. At the end of our study for the evening we were ask to write a prayer of praise thanking God for all He had created for our pleasure. I began to write and my spirit smiled as I thanked God for one of my favorite things, sunshine I even drew a sun and colored it bright yellow; I then laughed as I thanked God for my second favorite thing which is chocolate in any form and the way it can also brighten my mood or put a smile on my face. While at work the next day, I turned to find a box of chocolate cupcakes with chocolate icing and a card on my desk. Upon opening the card I found a big sunshine with a smiley face looking back at me with the words praying for you in this time of “unknown” a tear came to my eye as I felt the very presence of God and the intimate way He was showing me that my heartfelt praise to Him the night before had been a pleasing fragrance to God! What an amazing testimony it became, as I shared the significance of the gift and how it was a message straight from the hand of God with the person who had delivered it!

I wish I could say I never had a doubt or fear from that moment forward, but to be completely transparent my old companion “anxiety” came a knocking. The voice of anxiety wanted me to ponder the possibility of a cancer diagnosis and fear the consequences that would bring. For a moment I did entertain the thoughts but as I felt fear and anxiety creeping through my veins I rebuked those thoughts and began to instead name the blessings that could come from what appears to be a blessing less diagnosis.

•God had brought me to this job 5 short months ago; it gave me health insurance benefits and probably ensured I would do my yearly exam and find the problem before it got any further.

• I would have more empathy for the patients as I walked in their shoes.

•I could use this situation to instill the importance of good health habits and yearly checkups to my daughter.

•God had given me the word “joy” for this year and I was going to learn how to have joy in all circumstances and He was preparing me for my destiny!

I never once thought that this would be anything other than bad news. But one thing I never lost sight of was “who” held my future! I kept my eyes on Jesus and my ears tuned to praise music all of which was powering me through the 4 day wait for the revealing of the unknown!

My heart leaped with joy as they told me it had been a false alarm; the new images cleared things up! Whew! what an intense 4 day journey that had become. I learned so much through this event being allowed in my life. I saw that God had changed me from the inside out and when my old companion anxiety came a knocking it did not find a comfortable place to hang out! Praise God! I also got to experience a very personal very caring God who, as I sought His comfort and guidance, filled me with a joy that made no earthly sense under my current looming circumstances , yet testified to His presence in my life to those around me.

A study of the word Joy revealed the Greek word Chara derived from Chario who’s definition is ” calm delight; gladness a feeling of calm and control no matter the circumstances or your emotional state”

I praise God today for my report of good health! and for sunshine and let’s not forget chocolate!!!